A bright and early monday morning to you. It is 7:54 A.M. as I write this and I'm in the music groove...I'm picking up an indie station out of Austin and it has been nothing but one good song after another. Flemming Lips, "Do you Realize?" Elvis Costello, Florence And The Machine, St. Vincent...Definitely a good way to start the day. It is such a rarity to hear REALLY good music. I'm held hostage to Houston alternative and to be quite frank one can only hear Bush's)'' Glisterine " so many times...there used to be a great indie station that was around for about 2 years and then it became a christian alt.rock station...I suppose in iHouston Jesus is bigger than the Beatles. Who knew? Actually, well...never mind.
So, I realized that even on death row we have out own version of the 'dick sick' ( I'm soon laughing writing this!) minus the fancy smancy smart phones and Internet. The guy that was in the cell next to me was sent to F-
" Hello" or smiles at them, it gives them the green light to whip it out and say " Look at my penis!Before the guy was put on F-
not funny, but it is funny. Stranger than fiction.
On a serious note, I do think that some of this growing behavior has increased because of the draconian enforcement of their no sexually suggestive or expliiti material guideling they have. I mean, lately they've denied US WEEKLYS Entertainment magazines and even magazines like Allure/Glamour/Cosmo
( guysget them mostly because they have the little perfume strips in them to make
their cells smell good.) And who doesn't like looking at a pretty face as well? I mean, these are publications that a ten year old can buy on the bubble gum rack checking out at Krogers...it is ridiculous. More frustrating for me, because I read a lot of " Mature " themed comics from Publishers like IMAGE
or Dark Horse that are geared for adults ( which last time I checked I am...I mean, geeze, I'm entering into old man territory in a couple of weeks!) each issue I have to worry about whether or not it is going to show a flash of side boob or a couple in bed and undoubtedly be denied... I'm a realist. I get it. There are people back here who have sex crimes. I understand that, but I do feel it greatly exacerbates the problem by not allowing them to take their sexual aggression or whatever out on a magazine instead of a female officer or even an inmate. It seems, in my opinion, to have created a far more dangerous environment. I'm no psychologist but it does seem to be common sense. There are guys back here who've said frankly that they never even thought about entertaining the idea of masturbating on a female officer until they started heavily restricting things. I'm just being honest.
So, last week I was listening to KPFT News. KPFT is an affiliate of the Pacifica Foundation...their rooted in peace and liberalism. I enjoy the station because not all, but a good chunk of it speaks to my liberal leaning views. I don't listen to it as much as I used to because it seems to have gotten a little
too left for me, but there are some programs that I really love on thier. It was thursday the 21st and they had some woman on there speaking for an
anti death penalty group and she kind of ticked me off...First, almost nothing she was saying about death row conditions were true...I am a person who believes that if you're trying to bring attention to something and making a change has to be rooted in facts...If someone tried to investigate your claims
and they turn out to be bullshit it only hurts the chances of trying to improve anything. This lady was saying that we don't regulary have running water ( huh?'They haven't shut our water off in ages. Hell, when a dayroom on c-
had a busted toilet that was erupting like ol' falthful and there were rumors that they were going to shut the water off to fix it but they didn'tisti we haven't been for a lack of water in quite some time. Another thing she said was that they weren't letting us get our recreation which is not true. We have a choice of whether we want to go to rec. or not. I've not seen a guard jack a rec. in a long time. Some people just choose to not go. Now, they have taken showers before, but not to just take it...
it is because they have a no " traffic and trading policy" Meaning, that if I´m in the day room and I get caught by the guards trying to pass a book or some food to another inmate, I can get a disciplinary write up. It is a crap rule, but it is a rule.
It is a serious enough infraction by their own definition that it could have you placed on F-
I'm not saying it is fair or right even, but it does beat spending three months down on F-
So, she continued on with stuff that she had no clue as to what she was talking about...But here's the part that really got my goat; the reporter asks..oh, wait, let me back up and add that the lady was comparing the freedom/priveleges of death row prisoners when they were housed on the Ellis Unit in Huntsville compared to the solitary conditions of Polunsky Unit. So, then the reporter asks, " Well, why did these conditions change?" she replies, " Oh, the Texas Seven." HUH???Totally not true, and maybe it was an honest mistake, but things changed because a couple of guys TRIED to escape on Ellis. Not the texas Seven. Only one guy made it over the fence on Ellis and he was shot and later found dead in a creek nearby or something. My point in this little tangent is that people need to get their facts straight if they're going to push for a change because otherwise, the officials just nod thier head while internally thinking " this is just another anti death penalty activist nut who has no fuckin' clue." That is the way they look at the anti activist community.
Why givethem the ammo?
I think I have some new songs posted. Not sure if they're up or not but I was looking over my 'lyrics' and I thought, " man, I'm writing really sub par crap lately." I don't know why but I just can't find the words for anything anymore. It all seems the same...same topic, same love torn pain...I'm getting to the point where I have a BUNCH of unfinnished work...
So, they are crap and I'm aware of it. That being said, the other day me and this guy came up with a great idea for a bad B-
He drew a blank and then it hit me...I clearly saw a giant tsunami type wave of hundreds-
Here in a shortwhile I'll be headed to rec. I think the guard said 3rd round. So that'll be sometime around noon or after lunch. So, I'm going to wrap this up. I'm still tyring to get into the groove , of writing regulary ( a work in process) and hopefully I can write a little something each day. We'll see. Until then...
Got up this morning to go outside and play some basketball. I was up at about 5:20 A.M. to ask the officer if he could put me outside with the guy in 69 cell because he's the only other person on the run that does play ball. We went outside and it was really nice. Not too humid. Perfect conditions so we ended up running 40 games to which I won 22-
I'm fifteen pages in. I have the whole movie mapped out in my head and when I get to something I don't have any knowledge about ( like oil rigs and earth quakes) and it makes no sense I say " It doesn't matter! It's a B-
I figure if I write 5-
So, yesterday I was lectured to by another inmate about something I wrote
in my journals. It kind of ticked me off and I found it totally hypocritical and amusing...I say amusing because I have literally ZERO interest in reading other people's blogs. maybe it's because I'm a bit snobbish when it comes
to what I read, but I don't really care about gossip back here or even reading crap (I'm well aware that some would find my own writing crap. I'm not saying I'm any better...believe me) and judging what people write. Plus,
I get easily irritated when people embellish or straight up lie about things that Have Wappend back here. I write from my own experiences. It is my world, through my eyes. And truth be told I do try to filter much of what I write. there are things that happen that I can't write about because it could get others in trouble.
So I'm aware of that when I write.
Neither do I try to dress every little thing up. I can honestly say that what I write is as accurate and truthful as I can make it...
So, it is interesting to me, at least, that some people back here would get other inmates blogs, criticize or judge.
It is amusing that some dude back here even cares what I write about.
Because,I have little interest in what they write. Here in the last couple of years there seems to be a lot of short term memory and a whole 'do as I say but not as I do' mentality. People quick to point fingers, judge, etc. But whatever, I can't let it change or cause me to further censor myself. I have enough to concern myself with already. Yay.
Tomorrow is my sections off day so I'm trying to get as much possible done today so I can just kick back and relax, read, listen to the radio tomorrow. Maybe even work on CROCNAMI!